When you search for 'The best doula in Singapore', you might find articles from mom magazines online listing doulas. This is not to be relied on. There have not been any research or comparisons done by these magazines. Do you want to know how to be listed?
You pay for it.
How do I know? Because I have been asked. There was a time I did pay for it, just a small amount to be listed and it was for an article that did not say 'best'. It did appear as a marketing tool to be listed as an article. The only listing I've been on that was free is Singapore's Finest.
But in the lastest email to me to ask to be listed on The Wedding Vow.... They asked for a whopping $2000. I have decided to refuse.... It is misleading and a whole lot of bullshit.
NOW. How do you choose the best doula?
You might have just learned about what a doula is and you're curious because let's be honest. Not many people around you here know what a doula is.
So by some sort of angelic whisper, you're now ahead of the pack. You start reading up about what a doula is.
"A doula is a trained professional who provides emotional, physical and informational support to new and expectant parents before, during and after birth, as well as possibly while trying to conceive or in the early postpartum period." - What to Expect
Sounds pretty vague doesn't it?
A doula should really be categorised based on her function. There are Birth Doulas, Fertility Doulas, Death Doulas, Post partum doulas, c-section doulas. From what I gather, a doula is a guide and emotional support in all these areas. They do not perform a medical function even if you have a doula with a medical background - Nursing for example.
In the end, what do you think it is you need from your doula? Asking questions about their way of support could enlighten you. It may feel like these magazines have done their job of screening. I assure you, they did not. So please do your research. I could list the Doulas I like but again, that would be totally biased....and incomplete.
If you're trying to avoid a c-section, a possible question to ask is. "What Is the c-section rates under her care?" A doula should be able to troubleshoot. While most of my births have been fast (7 hours or so), even with rods in one woman's back, there will be times I have to work with the physical. Relaxation as well as manoeuvres will be important. This is especially so with previous c-section mums, where there might have been blockages of emotions that need to be released. These prolonged processes can take days but it is highly rewarding to the mums who have gone through it.
Do you feel a connection?
The fact is there is a lid for every jar. There are doulas with varying skills and approaches towards birth - just like the way obstetricians behave differently even though we all think a natural birth is the best.
What all doulas can do is give you counsel so you can make a decision that's yours. Some doulas do not give you all the information because they don't believe its their place. I disagree with this. So far my clients have looked for a doula to provide the information and risks of whatever comes up.
Some doulas do not believe in hypnobirthing (even though they are advertised as hypnobirthing practitioners which is appalling.). Usually they are more physical and emotional comfort oriented and believe that is the way to a relaxed birth. Sure, I believe birth is a physical and emotional event - but I also believe its very subconscious oriented - of which only hypnosis can access. I have personally seen the rate of epidurals drop drastically amongst my clients ever since introducing hypnobirthing education. I am so drawn to hypnosis as a tool that I even travelled across to San Francisco to train under a well known Hypnotherapist by the name of Randal Churchill. (and his amazing posse of hypnotherapists) I use it so extensively during labour I now cannot imagine my work as a doula without it.
Are they fearless?
Despite our roles as birth doulas, there are a frighteningly number of traumatised birth doulas who have a lot of fear. It is seen in their speech. The way they would tip toe around doctors (conflict of interest here!). Fear is contagious energy in the birth room. You'd want to build an atmosphere of confidence. Fear creates the tension which creates your painful birth experience. It does not allow endorphins to flow. Only relaxation allows endorphins to flow.
The most important thing is finding a doula you believe can help with your transformation... right now, you are likely to be scared and uncertain. The following are a list of doulas I believe can also guide you to a confident, beautiful birth.
Doulas I like: (other than myself! lol!)
Leila - Warrior type, fun and now a doula trainer from Leila and Co
Yen - hypnobirthing and baby expert from Birth Discovery
Chiew Gin - soothing demeanour, great for homebirths Now for Beyond
Hospitals that allow Doulas
NUH (Just a few)
Mt E Novena
Mt E Orchard
Thomson Medical
Gleneagles